NJ EP (Demo B sides)

by Jimothy

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Spring 2011


released March 22, 2011

Elissa Souris' Computer




James Metelak Brigantine, New Jersey

Indie-folk Acoustic Singer-Songwriter Multilingual World Traveler Music That is Sometimes to God, and sometimes not.

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Track Name: Set Me As a Seal
Set me as a seal upon your heart
Oh Love stronger than death
That I may feel through every part
Your burning, fiery breath

And then like wax held in the flame
I'll take the imprint of your Name

Set me as a seal upon Your arm
Oh Love that bursts the grave
Your coals of fire can never harm
But only purge and save
Oh Jealous Love, oh burning flame
Burn out all unlike Your name

The floods can never drown Your love
Nor weaken Your desire
The rains may deluge from above
But never quench your fire
Make soft my heart in your strong flame
To take the imprint of Your name
Track Name: Sigh With the Waves
Sigh with the waves--tide out
I'm missing you today
All the words
Blow like foam
Moonlight on water glass
Clear my throat
And hope things come to pass
I don't quite trust You

So hold me on the shore
So I can sing and dance a little more
It's the only way
I know how to pray this pain

sand shifting flying feet
I ran into a fence the other day--in the rain
It left a line across my chest
I was running from the feelings in my head
Didn't work so well
A towel and some tea
These friends you gave to me
So far away So far away

And God I feel that You must be
Somewhere out past Aberdeen
Somehow transatlantic

The static and the cut-outs
in our skype prayer conversations
I need you so much nearer
I need you so much nearer
Can I see your face?
You're walking out upon the waves
I wish they'd swallow me
And take me out to sea
But I sit on a carpet floor
I'll sing some songs, I'll pray some more
If you come back in the next nine months
Meet me in Jersey

Come out, come out, come out, you say
Come out with me upon the waves
No, I'd rather not
I'm tired and hope is hard
Each wave we climb means another fall
And more good-byes
Stay with me
I'll try to follow, see
But when I tried to walk on water
I just got wet
Track Name: Gather (Piano)

Gather all your buckets
And put them in meadow
Catch the rain, catch the rain,
Can you catch it on your tongue?

Gather up the dirt to dam
The rivers in the road
Watch erosion cut away
The walls that we've called home

Gather all the dewy stems
Of sorrel, clover, dandelion
Catch a salad in your hands
And picnic in the road

Gather up your candles
Shut the breakers down a while
Feed a roaring bonfire a branch
Feel the dewdrops on your toes

Hear the quiet
Let it go
Set your feet
To the road

Gather up the swirling sea
Into a sushi roll
Gather up the breeze
Into a sailsong we can bellow

Gather all the sand to glass
Curl it as you blow
Twirl the gulls, catch the wind
Let go
Let go
let go

Catch the music
Let it flow
Set your eyes
To the sunglow

Gather up your bags
Throw it all out, save for one
You don't get a carry-on
When the dusty trail is done

Gather up your friends
Into their beds beneath the soil
Ezekiel can these dry bones dance
Lord You alone can know
Track Name: Head Heart Gut Hands
Head Heart Gut Hands

I want to love you with everything I have
Head, heart, gut, hands
I want to give you all the best things that I have
Time, cash, skills, plans

My waking worries are far from you
My twilight dreams are all selfish
Doubts define me, fears and stress
Cacophony inside my head


My time affections waver fast
Girls and safety, plans and friends
Wounds and crushes ebb and flow
Above all, my heart is fickle


My first instinct is to run from you
I know I'm gonna leave you soon
Guilt and shame, angst and fear
I am two men on the inside

My two hands are quick to sin
My busyness is vanity
Quick to anger, slow to help
Grasping, striving, industry

(chorus 2x)
Track Name: Samson

You can cut off all my hair if you want to
I'm tired of being strong
You can come and run my life if you dare to
Just don't let me be alone

You can ruin all my plans if you want to
I know it's what you'll do
I'm letting go, of addict control
I don't know how to let go

Head bowed solemn to the table
So as not to meet your eyes
You can fight me if you want to
Tear the curtains from the wlal
I think I need you to wreck me
You can make it so hard to sleep
But lately it's been too easy

You can take me somewhere else if you want to
Put me in a body bag
Everyone goes to the junkyard
Everyone's going to die
You can come and kiss my lungs if you want to
I'll keep singing and never die
Put me in a special choir
Or let me wash holy dishes with rags
I think that'd be nice
Yes, I think it'd be nice

Head bowed solemn to the table
So as not to meet your eyes
You can fight me if you want to
Tear the curtains from the wlal
I think I need you to wreck me
You can make it so hard to sleep
But lately it's been too easy

I think that'd be nice
Yes, I think it'd be nice
To fail sometimes
So I could cry
Resting my head on your thighs
Track Name: When am I Supposed to Go
When am I supposed to go?

When am I supposed to go?
How am I supposed to know?
When is this gonna end?
When do I settle down?

No pillow for your head
They say we're far from home
It's how I live my life
Deep or wide, scattering myself across oceans, tides
People-pleasing, you think I should sabbath
I'm a people-pleasing addict

I know love, not to seek my own
I know you're not really the one I always love
I like my place on the stage, I like my angst
My addictions are behind me, but you're not my everything

I'm hoping that you'll at least lead
I'm hoping you'll chase after me
I'm hoping what you've given will sustain
I'm exhausted God, I'm still in pain

I know this is a selfish song
I don't really need to know
Just whisper in my ear
And I'll walk with you down this road
Your paths are better
Your plans are better
Track Name: Skeptic Shepherd
This house is such a mess
I didn't think you would come so soon
The beds were full up man
I'm sorry but there isn't any room
Holidays remind us of the homes we left behind
And the people far from my eyes

I'm sorry bout the shit
We'll clear a space so you can sleep
Man it's been rough around here
Where the hell you been?
We've been waiting
We stopped waiting

You're not much to look at there
Straw tangled in your hair
I was hoping for some help
Guess I expected something else

Damn, and really though why would you stay with us?
I hate to say it, but we ain't got much,
I hope it's enough

Este templo es tu templo
Make yourself at home I guess
Welcome to your world
Do you think you can fix all this?
I'm sorry I'll stop talking
Rest on us so we can rest
Track Name: Ninety-Five Percent
Ninety-Five Percent

Like 95% of songs are love songs
But I won't sing one for you
You'll feel some type of way
I keep telling myself
To make you choose me
Instead of darkening your door
Every chance I get

But it's where I want to be
Even though I know this isn't lasting
You told me there were other forms of intimacy
I really think love is all the same
You want to hold it, you want everything
Maybe I'm just crazy

If you chased me, I'd run away, I'd be afraid
I'd realize how foolish this is
This continual charge is much more safe
You'll always see it coming

It's not a question of love
It's something more like wisdom or call
Why I won't sing you
A love song
I won't sing you a love song
Track Name: Wednesdays

I'm not an addict except on Wednesdays
Cuz that's the worst day of the week
Self-medication for all my failings
Better than the killing pills the doctor gives

I--know I will die--on a Wednesday
I--know we're all addicts in the end
Balance, you gotta hold your head up high
You've gotta hold onto something
When you're this scared of heights

Don't worry, I'll be fine tomorrow
By then I'll put out the flames
You deserve much better than me
Get away, I'm just not ready

I'm not insane except on Wednesdays
Cuz that's the day it always rains
Rain, clean my hands, clean my lungs out
Cuz I never want to do this thing again
I never want to do this stupid thing again

I'm not a saint except on Thursdays
Cuz that's the day I always pray
God, how I've changed, I'm not ok
I don't want to ever see this place again
Don't let me ever see this place again
Track Name: God Forgive Me
God Forgive Me

God forgive me
I know exactly what I'm doing
No excuses
I ran through them long ago

Could you really change my heart this time?
We've been through all this at least a dozen times?

God forgive me
I don't know how to live
No excuses
For the things I've done again

Cuz we've been here before
You've met me in this mess
I think that you want more
Cuz victory don't look like this

Could you really change my heart this time?
We've been through all this at least a hundred times?

I'm back on my knees
Can you save me please
Apathy, lust, greed
God forgive me

Wake me up when the morning dawns
Could you make things new again
You're the one I've been waiting on
I betrayed my father and friend

I've been fashioning this hell in my mind
Where you can't touch me
You can't touch me
Oh please touch me
God please change me
Track Name: Red August Rush
It's the same familiar tune it's knocking at my attic ear
It's breaking brain in two I think I feel my heart again
And you're still here, waltzing around all my fortifications
We haven't spoken in months

The sea is glowing green again, greedy at the shore
It's like nothing has changed, warm south wind
I almost ask if you would ask something of me
The words fall off my lips into the empty night unsaid

I've been running, I've been waiting
For something to take me past all this
The plane is boarding at terminal B
I'm getting in line again

If I change the faces frequently enough
Maybe I will forget that one familiar smile
Forget that I could be loved
My frenetic compensation for letting you down is wearing thin

I'm moving on this time
(I can't be paralyzed any longer)
It get easier with time
(That's what I keep telling myself)

I keep convincing myself it's better to keep up the motions
Than feeling the impact, the bruise in my eye
I didn't hear your voice this time
Convincing myself that that's fine

Come back, please stay,
I promise I won't go away
No, that's not true
I know I'll leave you
I'm a wanderer through and through

Jasmine scent, the sprouting buds
Suggest that I could learn to love
I'm a perennial failure, an annual death
Hoping that You'll come around again
Just to hold my hand
Hold me one more step
Don't let the music
Slip out of my head

And I'm broken
That's where we begin